3 AM

Certain times of the night/early morning hold special importance to me. Such as 2:30 Truth Time.

While editing our epic short on the world of muggle Quidditch, around hour 10 of editing at 2:30am in the Berg, the three of us decided to pour our hearts out. The truth behind our short lives came tumbling out and amidst constant replays of Gavin's "certainly" no rock was left unturned. Hence, 2:30 truth time. This magical hour constantly seems to the opportune time for humans to discuss their secret hopes and dreams.

But more recently, 3 am holds the most importance to me. My body has a hard time staying asleep if anything is on my mind. During my previous year of employment, even if I was black-out drunk off of Boone's Farm in St Louis, I woke up at exactly 3am with some NGO's acronym on my mind. IMOW, Rare, GP, MLK.... why couldn't I find these people to fill these rolls? Did I send out that second round of e-blasts? Did I confirm that 9am interview? Will my boss even be in at 9am for the interview?? Did I record the responses? Did I email my boss the responses? Did I even get any responses? OMG, what if no one responded... that means I must have effed up the e-blast... was my grammar incorrect? A link broken? An email address wrong?? I'll just get-up and check my outbox.....

But since my switch in jobs and general decrease in life stress, my 3ams have come and gone without a blink of the eye - unless it was REM. Even if I went to be at 2:45am, 3am was just a dreamy memory. No wake-ups, no freak outs, no acronyms.

But recently my 3am wake-up calls have returned. Except instead of my mind screaming an acronym or pushing me to recall if I had completed a task I most usually did complete, I just wake up blank. There's no reason in my mind to be staring out my window or convincing myself that the ghostly white blob near my door is my bathrobe. My brain can't logically determine why I am awake, although I'm pretty sure it knows and just won't share its secret.

So I have once again fallen into the pattern... asleep, awake at 3am, fitful sleep for 3 hours, awake for the day... repeat.

Why have a recommenced waking up again? Why can't I figure out why I'm waking up? Why 3am??

I must be lonely...